The Bodice Ripper

Ye gods, but it's been ages since I've read a romance novel...

"Well, damn and damn again," Vivenka muttered testily as branch snagged and ripped part of her bodice as she wandered, hopelessly lost in the woods, searching for her beloved horse who threw her after being frightened by what appeared to be a snake but upon further inspection only turned out to be a bit of rubber tubing which she'd thrown down with disgust before stomping off hot-headedly, as was her way, and wound up as she was now, bedragged, muddied, and desperately hoping to avoid her impending loveless arranged marriage with the most ruthlessly cold Count D'Orazio who held her family's company, and their livelihood, in the palm of his long, elegant, yet very masculine, hand.

...they're always good for a laugh.